Part 7 - For The Love of Rust
You may recall that the aborted trip to Cornwall turned out to have a rusty lining: When the car came off the transporter, holes had magically appeared in both sills where filler from previous bodged repairs had shaken free, leaving fresh air where metal once kept the car together.
With my eldest son suitably bribed (with an entry in the XJS at an Autotest) and a dear friend's offer of a dry Essex barn to work in, we started cutting away the rusty mess. My hope was that the front and rear sill repair sections I had ordered from xjspanelshop.co.uk would be sufficient and that we would not need the very expensive genuine sills.
It had been a job that I had been putting off for months...but now we had made the first cut, there was no going back. More and more rusty metal dropped onto the barn's floor until we were left with the ugly truth! Fortunately the front end of the inner sills just needed a patch to repair before the replacement panels were welded in place, but the rear left hand outer and inner sills were non existent, together with a substantial portion of the inner wheel arch....rather worrying as the rear suspension radius arm now had no support at all.
Max kept to his word and spent the following two weeks fabricating new sections of floor pan, inner wheel arch, inner rear sills, flanges and welding them and the sill repair sections into place.
In addition we had to figure out what to do with the the lower front crossmember that holds the radiator in place and links the two front legs of the chassis: Whoever had bodged the repairs of the sill had also had their evil way here. Instead of replacing the rusted steel, they had simply tack-welded a strip of mild steel over the missing metal and sprayed it liberally with underseal to conceal the problem. From underneath the car, all looked fine...it was only when the front spoiler and under-tray were removed that you could see the problem.
To replace the whole section would mean dismantling the front end of the car...something we did not have time to do. We were now up against the clock: The Autotest was now only a few days away and we still needed to get an MOT.
There were other pressing issues that needed rectification to pass the MOT: A small but vital system, the windscreen washers, refused to work. We had worked on eliminating the problem for hours without success and the MOT date was getting closer. I left Max pondering what to do with the crossmember whilst I went out to buy a new washer pump and electrical sundries.
By the time I returned Max had fixed the crossmember with an elegant solution. He had formed two strong steel box section cradles and welded them along their entire length to the remains of the original crossmember. Stronger than the original, this might just come in handy for the front mountings of a planned sump guard.
There had been just one moment of panic...the amount of heat generated by the welding ignited the underseal just under the rear seat...leading to some singed carpet and upholstery. Luckily we had prepared for this eventuality and judicious use of a CO2 fire extinguisher brought the problem under control.
With just an hour remaining before our appointment for the MOT, there was time for a quick spray of primer on the sills and a temporary rig for the washers, with the live feed exiting the bonnet, taped to the front wing and to the relay & fuse box via the door frame - it didn't need to be pretty for the MOT inspector. My other worry was one of the headlamps - I felt the reflector was just on the wrong side of rusty, but having a high powered light bulb in my spares box, I thought this might just swing it in our favour.
With minutes to go, we took out the headlight. As we did so, Sod's Law jumped it and one of the mounting brackets snapped off so we couldn't put it back. Max grabbed the welder and quickly tacked it in place...but what I hadn't foreseen were the fumes now in the headlight assembly. There was no time to do anything else but change the bulb and put it back.
The MOT was booked for last thing on a Friday afternoon to give us maximum time to get the work done. The Autotest was on the Saturday morning. So it was now or never. We raced to the MOT station. As normal, there was a lot of sighing and sucking of teeth by the tester, but no indication of a pass or fail until the very end of the inspection.
All had gone well, and even the windscreen washers performed (after a fashion). The welding was up to standard and all our work on the subframe and suspension was fine. Nevertheless, it was an MOT failure: The fumes in the repaired headlight had settled on the lens so the beam was too obscured. After two weeks solid work, we had failed at the last hurdle.
I was bitterly disappointed for Max. He had worked day after day to get the job done, only for the car to fail on something small. After all that, I could not go back on my promise, so I called the Autotest organisers and swapped the entry to our other Jaguar, a 2002 XKR. A car that has been molly coddled its entire life. It was about to get a wake up call!
Saturday morning dawned bright and cold. Bovington Airfield was just above freezing with a keen wind. The Auto Tests were set out on one end of the now disused runway. After a safety briefing we were allowed to walk the tests to familiarise ourselves with the layout. In essence, it is simple: Weave in and out of cones through a course. The problem is trying to do this at speed whilst taking the correct course. Three attempts at each test and the best two times of each to count. Miss a cone, however, and the time is forfeit. There was an additional joker in the pack: During the week the airfield is used by Driftworks - which as it sounds, is all about drifting exotic sportscars around the track. To enable the cars to slide easily, the tarmac is sprayed with rapeseed oil. On a dewy morning in September, the mixture of oil and water generated a friction coefficient approximating to wet ice. It was difficult to stand up, let alone guide a car.
I had not driven competitively for many decades and Max had never even driven the XKR before, and now he was let loose with 400bhp! He didn't need any encouragement - the throttle pedal was mashed into the carpet and off we went. After the first two tests, Max was ahead of me by 0.6 seconds, but Dad managed to claw back the deficit in the remaining 4 tests. Sorry Son! By the sixth and last test, I had found my groove and posted 4th fastest time overall - not bad for a novice.
We had a great time and the XKR accepted all the punishment doled out (largely thanks to the massive Brembo brakes). The only casualties were the PZero tyres - we wiped off £00s worth of rubber in a total driving time of about 40 minutes.
This short event had been meant as an intense workout for the XJS to find out what would break/overheat...but now it was again languishing on the drive. However, within a week we had replaced the headlight with a good used item, re-taken the MOT and got the ticket.
After his hard work, I managed to insure Max on the XJS for a week. His first round trip the following day to visit friends and collect his younger brother from school (big respect) ended 70 miles later. My 'phone rang, Max's voice on the other end: "It's dark, raining and the car has stopped in the middle of a roundabout in Bishop's Stortford and won't restart"....
With my eldest son suitably bribed (with an entry in the XJS at an Autotest) and a dear friend's offer of a dry Essex barn to work in, we started cutting away the rusty mess. My hope was that the front and rear sill repair sections I had ordered from xjspanelshop.co.uk would be sufficient and that we would not need the very expensive genuine sills.
 |
| Let the welding begin |
It had been a job that I had been putting off for months...but now we had made the first cut, there was no going back. More and more rusty metal dropped onto the barn's floor until we were left with the ugly truth! Fortunately the front end of the inner sills just needed a patch to repair before the replacement panels were welded in place, but the rear left hand outer and inner sills were non existent, together with a substantial portion of the inner wheel arch....rather worrying as the rear suspension radius arm now had no support at all.
 |
| Not much left of the outer sill, inner sill and floor. |
Max kept to his word and spent the following two weeks fabricating new sections of floor pan, inner wheel arch, inner rear sills, flanges and welding them and the sill repair sections into place.
 |
| Front inner sill patched, floor patched and new flange |
 |
| Outer Sill Welding completed |
In addition we had to figure out what to do with the the lower front crossmember that holds the radiator in place and links the two front legs of the chassis: Whoever had bodged the repairs of the sill had also had their evil way here. Instead of replacing the rusted steel, they had simply tack-welded a strip of mild steel over the missing metal and sprayed it liberally with underseal to conceal the problem. From underneath the car, all looked fine...it was only when the front spoiler and under-tray were removed that you could see the problem.
To replace the whole section would mean dismantling the front end of the car...something we did not have time to do. We were now up against the clock: The Autotest was now only a few days away and we still needed to get an MOT.
There were other pressing issues that needed rectification to pass the MOT: A small but vital system, the windscreen washers, refused to work. We had worked on eliminating the problem for hours without success and the MOT date was getting closer. I left Max pondering what to do with the crossmember whilst I went out to buy a new washer pump and electrical sundries.
By the time I returned Max had fixed the crossmember with an elegant solution. He had formed two strong steel box section cradles and welded them along their entire length to the remains of the original crossmember. Stronger than the original, this might just come in handy for the front mountings of a planned sump guard.
There had been just one moment of panic...the amount of heat generated by the welding ignited the underseal just under the rear seat...leading to some singed carpet and upholstery. Luckily we had prepared for this eventuality and judicious use of a CO2 fire extinguisher brought the problem under control.
 |
| Oops! |
 |
| A Little Light Singing |
With just an hour remaining before our appointment for the MOT, there was time for a quick spray of primer on the sills and a temporary rig for the washers, with the live feed exiting the bonnet, taped to the front wing and to the relay & fuse box via the door frame - it didn't need to be pretty for the MOT inspector. My other worry was one of the headlamps - I felt the reflector was just on the wrong side of rusty, but having a high powered light bulb in my spares box, I thought this might just swing it in our favour.
With minutes to go, we took out the headlight. As we did so, Sod's Law jumped it and one of the mounting brackets snapped off so we couldn't put it back. Max grabbed the welder and quickly tacked it in place...but what I hadn't foreseen were the fumes now in the headlight assembly. There was no time to do anything else but change the bulb and put it back.
The MOT was booked for last thing on a Friday afternoon to give us maximum time to get the work done. The Autotest was on the Saturday morning. So it was now or never. We raced to the MOT station. As normal, there was a lot of sighing and sucking of teeth by the tester, but no indication of a pass or fail until the very end of the inspection.
All had gone well, and even the windscreen washers performed (after a fashion). The welding was up to standard and all our work on the subframe and suspension was fine. Nevertheless, it was an MOT failure: The fumes in the repaired headlight had settled on the lens so the beam was too obscured. After two weeks solid work, we had failed at the last hurdle.
I was bitterly disappointed for Max. He had worked day after day to get the job done, only for the car to fail on something small. After all that, I could not go back on my promise, so I called the Autotest organisers and swapped the entry to our other Jaguar, a 2002 XKR. A car that has been molly coddled its entire life. It was about to get a wake up call!
Saturday morning dawned bright and cold. Bovington Airfield was just above freezing with a keen wind. The Auto Tests were set out on one end of the now disused runway. After a safety briefing we were allowed to walk the tests to familiarise ourselves with the layout. In essence, it is simple: Weave in and out of cones through a course. The problem is trying to do this at speed whilst taking the correct course. Three attempts at each test and the best two times of each to count. Miss a cone, however, and the time is forfeit. There was an additional joker in the pack: During the week the airfield is used by Driftworks - which as it sounds, is all about drifting exotic sportscars around the track. To enable the cars to slide easily, the tarmac is sprayed with rapeseed oil. On a dewy morning in September, the mixture of oil and water generated a friction coefficient approximating to wet ice. It was difficult to stand up, let alone guide a car.
I had not driven competitively for many decades and Max had never even driven the XKR before, and now he was let loose with 400bhp! He didn't need any encouragement - the throttle pedal was mashed into the carpet and off we went. After the first two tests, Max was ahead of me by 0.6 seconds, but Dad managed to claw back the deficit in the remaining 4 tests. Sorry Son! By the sixth and last test, I had found my groove and posted 4th fastest time overall - not bad for a novice.
We had a great time and the XKR accepted all the punishment doled out (largely thanks to the massive Brembo brakes). The only casualties were the PZero tyres - we wiped off £00s worth of rubber in a total driving time of about 40 minutes.
This short event had been meant as an intense workout for the XJS to find out what would break/overheat...but now it was again languishing on the drive. However, within a week we had replaced the headlight with a good used item, re-taken the MOT and got the ticket.
After his hard work, I managed to insure Max on the XJS for a week. His first round trip the following day to visit friends and collect his younger brother from school (big respect) ended 70 miles later. My 'phone rang, Max's voice on the other end: "It's dark, raining and the car has stopped in the middle of a roundabout in Bishop's Stortford and won't restart"....
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